Steve Ballmer is very excited to be the new owner of the LA Clippers

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Today is the Clippers Fan Festival in Los Angeles, which means it’s the first chance fans have to welcome former Microsoft CEO and all-around super excitable guy Steve Ballmer as their new owner. Ballmer made, well, quite an entrance.

Eminem’s “Lose Yourself” seems just astoundingly appropriate for this occasion.

After high-fiving presumably every single Clippers fan in attendance, and after a couple of jokes from Clippers coach Doc Rivers, Ballmer took the stage at the Staples Center to introduce himself as the new owner. There was yelling. And excitement about the Clippers. And cheers about Larry. And then a lot of yelling. Steve Ballmer is a lot of things, but above all he’s a fan. He’s going to be a fun owner

The whole video is…

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Microsoft’s first Chromebook killer is a $200 HP laptop

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Microsoft announced that it would be working with its partners to release ultra-low-cost Windows laptops just over a month ago, and now thanks to a leak from MobileGeeks, it looks like HP will release one of the first of these ultra-low-cost computers. The HP Stream 14 is a 14-inch, Windows 8.1 computer that is expected to sell for a paltry $199.

The Stream 14 has an AMD processor, 1366 x 768 pixel display, 2GB of RAM, 32 or 64GB of internal storage, and a slot for an SD card. If you ignore the Windows stickers that are surely going to be located on the palm rests of the Stream 14, you’d be hard-pressed to tell it apart from HP’s Chromebook 14, a popular 14-inch Chromebook released late last year.

In addition, the documents…

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Microsoft Azure’s Cloud Services And Virtual Machines Experience “Service Interruption”

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Screen Shot 2014-08-18 at 12.57.15 PM Microsoft’s Azure cloud computing service is experiencing uptime issues around the world. According to the Microsoft Azure status dashboard, ‘virtual machines,’ ‘backup,’ and ‘cloud services’ are the heaviest hit. Here’s the company’s current message: I’ve reached out to Microsoft for comment and context on the issue. I’ll… Read More

Booting A PDP-11

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14765600178_a060ca014c_o As we move swiftly into an era of ubiquitous computing, Internets of Things, and mind-machine connections via wetware, it’s important to step back and take a look at where we’ve been. That’s why this How-To by Trammell Hudson is so cool. It shows how to boot a PDP-11 so you can play Adventure on a monochrome screen and reminds us that old computer were as finicky as Model… Read More

From Westfield Labs Comes An App To Let Your Pre-Order Meals From The Food Court

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dine on time One of the most recent applications from Westfield Labs is Dine On Time, an app that lets busy shoppers skip the line at restaurants in its food court and pay for their meal via mobile app. Since many of the diners in its San Francisco location are actually workers who have offices nearby, time is of the essence, and being able to place an order without having to wait in line is huge. Read More

We want you to help us review every ‘Simpsons’ episode ever

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Welcome to the first annual Verge Hack Week. We’re totally blowing up our site: we’ve given our reporters and editors the entire week to play with new tools and experiment with new storytelling ideas, while members of our amazing product team have gathered in New York to help build all sorts of interesting new things. Learn more.

We love binge-watching TV shows and have been desperately looking for a chance to one-up our 12-hour House of Cards season two marathon. As luck would have it, FXX is planning to show every episode of The Simpsons back-to-back starting this Thursday, August 21st at 10:00AM (here’s a handy schedule). Unfortunately, we can’t watch 552 episodes in one sitting because, as we’ve been told by legal, it’s…

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The sequel to Flappy Bird is called Swing Copters

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It looks like Flappy Bird creator Dong Nguyen has decided to come back after deciding his maddening bird-murder simulation was too addictiveTouch Arcade says his followup to Flappy Bird is called Swing Copters, and it’s due out on Thursday of this week. The game will be free to play with a small ad, or you can pay a dollar to remove the ad if you’re feeling generous.

There is a tiny bit of weirdness here: in May, Nguyen teased another new game with a screenshot that doesn’t have much to do with the video above. Touch Arcade has a solid reputation, though, so we’ll see what’s up when Swing Copters actually hits — and if Nguyen can recapture the surge of popularity that made him pull Flappy Bird in the first place.

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A brief history of Gordon Ramsay’s epicurean empire

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Welcome to the first annual Verge Hack Week. We’re totally blowing up our site: we’ve given our reporters and editors the entire week to play with new tools and experiment with new storytelling ideas, while members of our amazing product team have gathered in New York to help build all sorts of interesting new things. Learn more.

By Katie Drummond and Michael Zelenko

Simmer down, Gordon.

When The Verge features editor Michael Zelenko logged onto Hulu this weekend over dinner, eager to gorge himself on both an entire rack of ribs and programs hosted by celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay — Zelenko’s celebrity chef du jour — he found himself lost in Ramsay’s all-you-can-eat menu of programming. “It’s unbelievable,” says Zelenko, a…

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We broke Twitter with #brands

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Welcome to the first annual Verge Hack Week. We’re totally blowing up our site: we’ve given our reporters and editors the entire week to play with new tools and experiment with new storytelling ideas, while members of our amazing product team have gathered in New York to help build all sorts of interesting new things. Learn more.

Earlier today The Verge wrote about Tumblr’s decision to start scanning all image uploads for brands, a move so momentous I was prompted to upload an easy one to get them started:

This somehow triggered Twitter’s Magic Recs algorithm, which is meant to alert Twitter users of important conversations taking place in the global town square. Immediately, anyone smart enough to follow me and executive…

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US nuclear regulators were cracked twice by foreign hackers

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According to a NextGov exclusive, computers at the US Nuclear Regulatory Commission have been breached by foreign hackers at least twice in the last three years. The news comes from an official report from the Inspector General’s Cyber Crime Unit, which led the investigation. In the first breach, the tactic was a simple phishing scheme, sending an email to multiple employees asking them to fill out Google doc with their login information. A dozen employees clicked on the link, although it’s still unclear how many actually filled out the form. Later, an NRC employee’s personal email was hacked and used to send malware-laden PDFs to 16 different employees.

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Is your next phone a noPhone?

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Every so often, a device is created that is so singularly revolutionary in its execution, it’s difficult to imagine the world before it. The iPhone, the PC, and the Atari 2600 are examples of these kinds of revolutionary devices. Now you can add another gadget to the list: the noPhone. This handset is shatterproof, waterproof, and doesn’t require charging to function. It’s also completely resistant to NSA surveillance and hacking (to the best of our knowledge). Unfortunately, it is not yet equipped with Wi-Fi, nor Bluetooth, nor a screen or cellular connection for that matter. Still, as its creators note, noPhone can help you to “never again experience the unsettling feeling of flesh on flesh when closing your hand.” No pricing or…

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The team behind webOS TV jumps to Pebble to design the next generation of smartwatches

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Pebble is dead-serious about competing in the face of Android Wear and whatever Apple is presumably working on. To that end, the company has just announced that it has hired Itai Vonshak as head of product and UX and Liron Damir as head of design. Vonshak and Damir come to Pebble after working at LG, where they were instrumental in creating the user interface and design for webOS TV. Before that, they designed webOS for HP — though not everything they made there saw the light of day.

We spoke briefly with Vonshak, who says Pebble intends to focus heavily on a product-focused philosophy alongside a spirit of openness that’s appealing to his webOS roots. Pebble’s bet is that the wearable market won’t shake out like the phone market has —…

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Now Coming With Your Laptop: Large Helpings Of Cloud Storage

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Screen Shot 2014-08-18 at 9.45.12 AM Out this morning is a spec list for the forthcoming HP Stream laptop that will run Windows 8.1, and is expected cost $199. It’s a device that Microsoft hopes will compete with Chromebooks, Google’s laptop offerings that have consumed some PC market share, mostly among less expensive devices. To make machines running its operating system more competitive, Microsoft has reduced… Read More

Google Makes It Easier For Advertisers To Track Which Ads Generate Phone Calls

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4982722491_24b29a4516_o Over the course of the last year, Google’s AdWords advertising platform started launching a number of new products that allow advertisers to link ads and phone calls. Those include click-to-call ads, call metrics and calls as conversion in your AdWords stats, but today, it is taking this concept a bit further with the launch of Website Call Conversions. Read More

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